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What are the signs of domestic violence? How do you know you are in an abusive relationship?

Family Relations

Domestic violence is a serious problem that many women face in their lives, especially after marriage. In India too, this is one of the most common problems faced by women, inspite the fact that there are several domestic violence laws in the country. Domestic violence can take place on any women irrespective of their social, educational, or financial status. Abuse occurs when one partner tries to dominate and control the other person.

Domestic violence is not limited to physical abuse or physical violence alone. Violence is experienced in many different ways. Emotional, sexual, verbal, and economic abuses, along with physical abuses, are all different forms of domestic violence. At times, a married woman may not be physically abused by her partner but she may not be aware of the fact that she is actually been emotionally or mentally been abused. Hurting someone’s mind and emotions is as good as hurting someone physically.

Usually, it’s not the physical abuse that comes first and that is why many women don’t even know that they are a victim of domestic abuse.

For instance, a husband does not allow her wife to meet her parents but he has never hurt her physically. Just because the husband has not beaten her and she has been taught from her childhood to obey and respect her husband, she feels that it is her moral duty to follow whatever he says so, even if that means that she won’t be able to meet her parents. This is actually an emotional domestic abuse but she fails to understand it. This is the case with most women in our country.

 

So, let’s get to know the different signs of domestic violence for a woman

Physical violence: You have been hurt physically. The signs are as follows:

  • Your husband slaps, kicks and punches you
  • He pulls your hair
  • He leaves you in an unknown place
  • He does not allow you to sleep or eat
  • He does not allow you to get medical care
  • He keeps you locked in a room or in your house

Your husband controls you, bullies and threatens you as well

  • You are accused of having external affair
  • He criticizes your looks, appearance and your work
  • He controls you on what to wear
  • He controls you on how to look
  • He constantly threatens you to kill you
  • He threatens to harm someone close to you, maybe your parents, kids or siblings
  • Yells at you for no reason
  • Throws things here and there when angry and tries to hurt himself

Your husband controls your finances

  • He does not allow you to spend money without his knowledge
  • Your money, credit and debit cards are with him
  •  Gives you a fixed amount of money and takes an account of each penny spend
  •  May not allow you to take up a job
  • May not give you money for basic needs like food and clothes

Your husband forces you to live a lonely life

  • Do not allow you to meet your family and friends
  • Always suspect you of meeting them
  • You have to take permission to meet them or talk with them
  • You are constantly been watched
  • He makes you feel small and embarrasses you in front of others

Your husband abuses you sexually

  • He forces you to have sex, irrespective of time and your mood
  • Forces you to wear sexy clothes
  • Forces you to stay nude in front of him
  • Won’t use condoms or any birth control methods
  • He does not care about your wishes

These are the different signs of domestic violence. Domestic violence is a serious crime and it should never be ignored. So dear ladies, if you feel that you are a victim of domestic violence, don’t keep it to yourself. Share with your friends and your known ones. Report it to police. Give your spouse psychological treatment if required. But don’t remain silent. By keeping silent, you are encouraging him to make you suffer a lot. One main reason for women to remain silent and suffer is that they are not empowered and financially independent. Its  a call for all women, moms, sisters, housewives to do something that will enable them to earn and live a happy life.

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